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Episode # 534   Joe Nunziata - How to Stop Chasing and Start Living

About The Episode:

Does the pursuit of happiness sometimes leave you drained and overwhelmed? If you’re tired of “the chase” and are open to a more fulfilling and sustainable way of life, then today’s episode of The Inspiration Show was made for you. Join bestselling author Joe Nunziata as he reveals a remarkable way to break free from this cycle - and align yourself with true peace and joy.

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EPISODE TRANSCRIPTION

Episode # 534 Joe Nunziata - How to Stop Chasing and Start Living

NL: Hi everyone! My name is Natalie Ledwell and this is the Inspiration Show. Today on the show I have a special guest who has a new book out called “Chasing Your Life.” And he is someone I’ve just been introduced to recently. And I’m very excited about sharing the information about this book with you and all the goodies that he has inside. But before we do that, I just want to remind you that if you are watching this show live on Facebook or a little bit later on our YouTube channel, don’t forget that after the show is over, you can click the link below this video and take my 30-second quiz so we can figure out what’s holding you back from success. So let me introduce my special guest today, Mr. Joe Nunziata. How are you Joe?

JN: I’m well. Thank you so much for having me.

NL: Ah, it’s a pleasure to have you here. This is fantastic. So, “Chasing Your Life,” this seems like an interesting book. Let’s start a little bit with your background and your story and what was the motivation into behind writing the book.

JN: Well I’m originally from Brooklyn, New York and now I live out here in sunny Southern California. But the real inspiration for the book was my own father, who was a New York City narcotics detective. And obviously started out actually as a gifted baseball player growing up in Brooklyn, was the youngest of 12 kids and went on, you know, thought he was gonna make it as a ballplayer and ended up becoming a New York City cop and a narcotics detective. He was always chasing, he always had that feeling of unrest, was always chasing after something that he thought would get him to where he wanted to be, which I don’t really know what that was but he ended up passing when I was 12 years old on the job ,which was of course a very emotional experience. But he passed it on to me and I went out started chasing everything. And you could imagine, and bankrupted myself twice by 30, and created a lot of problems and pain. So that was really the inspiration for the book, and that I’ve seen it in so many other people. I said, wow this is not just me, this is happening to a lot of people.

NL: Right. And so I’m assuming then it’s within our nature to always be chasing or striving for something else. Is there a healthy way to be able to do this?

JN: Yeah. I think it’s something that’s part of our DNA, in a sense of, you know, as human beings we are inventors, we are creators, we want to make things better. You know you could just see this, it’s just, you know, going back to cavemen with sticks and making spears, that’s just how we are. So the idea behind it is, say I want to keep that because that’s part of what makes us wonderful humans, but I want to remove that feeling of pressure, tension, anxiety that comes with trying to get to a certain place for a certain reason to attain a certain outcome. That’s the balance to say can I just do these things without the feeling, see it’s the emotion of stress and anxiety and wanting to do it for the wrong reasons that creates all the problems.

NL: Right. So but if we were chasing, you know, evolving into a better person or changing who we are so that we can shop in a better way, that’s okay, right.

JN: Yeah. The one thing I talked about in the book, I don’t like the word “chasing” because it has a negative connotation and it was funny because I was doing a sales training recently because I do a lot of work in the corporate world. I’ve another book called “Spiritual Selling” which is about selling, using, these principles and the people say, “Oh you were chasing the new accounts” and I say, you know, “Don’t say that” you know, why do you have to chase them and I said to the guy, I always say this, “If I walked out in the street and I started chasing somebody down the block, what would they do?” And they all say the same thing, or they’d run away. So I said why would you chase clients? It makes no sense. But again it’s a mentality that we have that’s good. Oh yeah, I’m chasing my dreams. Why do you have to chase them? See I want to get people out of that way of seeing it.

NL: Right. So if we’re shifting our perspective from chasing something or always striving for something, what is the language that we want to use, what is the action we want to take instead?

JN: Well to me, we’re creating because we’re here to create. So I’m creating something. I don’t have to chase it. I’m creating. Whatever I create will bring to me whatever is necessary for that specific creation. I don’t need to chase it. I’m just gonna create it, put it out there and just let it organically happen. Doesn’t mean I’m not doing anything, but it’s my feeling. As long as I’m not feeling like I’m chasing it. That changes the whole game.

NL: Right. So um, you just talked about feelings.  So emotions obviously play an important role here, and for me I think emotion is the frequency that we’re giving out. So are we looking to have emotions that are in alignment with the things that we’re wanting to create?

JN:  Well if the emotion you always want to have, that’s of course the most powerful emotion, is the feeling of love. So am I creating, I always say to people, what’s your driver is why you’re doing this? Is it a love based feeling? Is it a fear based feeling? Is it an “I have to prove myself” based feeling? Is it an egoic feeling? So if you’re creating from the space of love and sharing, that’s the best. So that’s what you have to say to yourself “Why am I creating this? Why do I want to do this? What is the feeling I get from doing it?” That’s the key to keeping yourself in that alignment, in that space.

NL: Yeah. Because that’s the thing, I mean motivation could be to stick it to someone else. I may be able to relate to that. But obviously that’s not a healthy way to do it, and it’s not sustainable.

JN:   Yeah. I mean again, it’s a negative vibration right, because it’s a negative energy. I’m doing it to hurt another person, in effect. I’m doing it to prove myself. It’s all negative. So higher vibration is sustainable, negative vibration is always going to cause you pain and suffering. So you have to kind of get over yourself here and say, I just, all I have to do is focus on what I’m doing and creating something that I feel good about, and let the chips fall down. Whatever everybody else does, that’s fine. It doesn’t concern me.

NL: Right. And so what do you think makes the difference between someone who has that motivation, is a real go-getter who can actually move forward, and those that may aren’t as motivated? What do you think is the difference between the two?

JN: Well I think a lot of it is fear-based, because we have people who want to do things. And I see it all the time. And you know I had a woman I’ll never forget. I used, my first book was called, “No More Nine-to-Five” and what I used to do is teach people how to start a home business while they had a job, which is what I had done. So I was, like, teaching people that same principle. This woman came to a class I was doing in New York at a college and you know we started communicating back and forth. And I remember I saw her 10 years later at an event and I said, Oh, thinking she’s gonna start her business, and then she said I’m still thinking about, I’m still thinking about it and I’ve talked to my parents and said, you know my brothers said it wasn’t a good time. So you know, she was just so fear-based and she just was afraid to step out of that old regime, of that old energy and she allowed herself to be held back. So people are just afraid, and they’re afraid of failure, they’re afraid of being ridiculed of their fear, they’re afraid, believe it or not, a lot of them are afraid to be wrong. And so you know, I wanted to do this and I was wrong it didn’t work. There’s no such thing as wrong. Every entrepreneur who was successful has failed a million times. So I’ve been wrong a million. I’m sure you too. We’ve, I’ve been wrong a million, I’ve been wrong a lot more than I’ve been right. And everybody always says you only need to be right once and that’s it. So I think people just, there’s a lot of fear and there’s also breaking the identity and breaking away from potentially your family and your friends, because as you elevate, they’re not coming with you and there’s a part of us that knows that and I don’t say that to be negative or just to say, oh you’re better than them. It’s just that you’re gonna go to a different place and they probably won’t go with you, and there is something innately within us in our tribal energy that holds that fear for us as well.

NL: Yeah. So let’s say that there’s someone that’s watching the show right now that can identify and go, you know what? You’re right. This is the reason I’ve been holding myself back. How do they step out of that fear?

JN: Well to me, to take one step at a time. Get up in the morning, start doing things to move yourself forward because you want to shift your energy. So what happens is your energy is based on motion and emotion. So if I have a motion and I start moving in a direction, I’m starting to build vibration and energy in that way. But one thing I always tell people is this, when you do it you are going to have fear, you are going to have discomfort, you are going to have nervousness, you’re gonna have anxiety. This is all part of it. Don’t worry about that. Accept. See here’s the key, don’t resist, and don’t make believe you don’t have it. Yes you’re gonna have fear, anxiety, pain, anxiousness. It’s all going to be there, accept it and just keep going forward. It’s part of the process and if you don’t feel fearful you’re in the wrong game because that fear is part of what is excitement of moving us forward to create something.

NL: Exactly. I mean I think for any of us to step outside of our comfort zone, believe me nothing fun and awesome is happening inside, all on the outside. Exactly feeling that pain and that fear mean it is part of the course, but of course you know you don’t want to stay there, you’re gonna get stuck there, you can want to keep moving forward like you said, one step at a time really helps you to move out of that. So the other thing that you mentioned in the book as well is making our decisions that are in alignment with the greater good. So let’s expand a little bit on what that actually means.

JN: Well the greater good means I’m doing something that’s for my, obviously, my greatest good because I’m the first one and everybody else’s greatest good. So if you look at government, if you look at politics, if you look at business, do they make decisions for the greater good or for personal gain? So you have to look at it and say to yourself, that doesn’t mean you don’t get personal gain, but is that the motivation? Now most people in an egoic state, they’re looking for their own personal agenda and their own personal advancement. They’re not saying, well, is this really the best for everybody? So the greater good means I’m making a decision that is really best for everybody, including myself, to expand the entire circumstance. That’s really what it comes down to. If you are focusing only on your own agenda then you’re in the wrong space. That’s really the greater good decision-making process. Also the greater good, it may not seem like, wow this may not even be the best thing for me, but it is the best for the whole situation, in the end it will be the best for you, too.

NL: Right. Exactly. Because in the end, we’re all connected, right.

JN: We’re all one energy, right? So if I do something to hurt you, I hurt myself. Same thing.

NL: Yeah. Absolutely. So you also talked about karma in the book as well. So is karma, I mean, my understanding of karma, which could be incorrect, karma is kind of like, you know, what I’m suffering or what I’m going through as a result of previous decisions. Is that how it works?

JN: Not really. You know karma is part of our whole life. Here is the karmic energy that we carry, that we bring into this lifetime. So basically the karma by definition is, your karma is the emotional blueprint for the life you came here to have. So you came to have an emotional experience, to have that experience that means you have to have positive and negative. So that because I can’t have emotion without both sides. So I understand that I say I came to have some negative experiences, some positive experiences. I wouldn’t know the difference but I came to feel specific emotions that I have to address, whatever those may be. And so your karmic journey is really your emotional journey that you came to have, which is why you selected your parents before you came, if they had the DNA make up that you needed for your journey. Also they had the skills for what you came to do for your purpose. So when you look at your parents you say well I didn’t like this about them, I didn’t like that about them but you know I look at my parents and say well they had certain skills that I got that I use that are important for what I do. So it’s a double-edged sword, so to speak. So we got the emotional baggage, so to speak, but we also got the skills from them. All part of your home.

NL: Yeah and I was having a conversation about that the other day and both this person and I were having a conversation going, wow, why don’t I choose my parents? [inaudible words] but obviously like, I know I agree. I think that we do choose certain situations because there are certain, you know, that says but it’s interesting how you refer to it as emotions, like there were certain emotions we’re supposed to feel in this lifetime rather than lessons. That’s an interesting take.

JN: Well it’s the same thing. It just reframing, because a lesson to me sounds like I had to do something or I had to learn something, not I had to feel something.

NL: Right.

JN: So I had to feel abandonment, I had to feel betrayal, I had to feel unworthiness, I had to feel loneliness. That’s what I came to experience. So you should think of it more as an experience to me than a lesson. There’s a lesson kind of has that school vibe that I don’t like. So it wasn’t my favorite place, so that’s why I try to, because you have to understand the words we use are important because they carry energy and vibrations. So I thought, you know, changing the words is important and if you say well I came to have this experience, is different.

NL: Right. Now I agree. Oh I like it. I may use it.

JN: Feel free.

NL: So what is the main message that you would like people to get from reading the book?

JN: Well, I really want them to understand that it’s not necessary to chase anything. You’re really here just to say, “What do I want to share with the world? How do I want to enjoy my life? I want my life to be easy. Well how could I make that happen and not feel this anxiety, this stress, the tension and also the attachment?" Letting go of attachment to the physical world and what people think and my title and so forth. Just be and let go of all that stuff. That’s the only way you’re gonna have a peaceful life because there will always be people in the world who you don’t agree with or have more than you or you don’t like their politics or whatever the case. The idea is for you to just I’m in total acceptance, be my best self. That’s all I’m here to do. Share what I can or follow my direction or write what I came to do and everything else let it take care of itself and just have faith that the higher power whatever you want to call it, the universe is going to support you as you stay on that path. Not to say it will always be easy because there will be obstacles. There will be things that you have to deal with, but it’s the idea of getting and staying on that path and having faith that you’re on the right track.

NL: Yeah. That’s awesome. So Joe where can we send people to connect with you and to get their hands on the book?

JN: Okay, so that’s good. So they can get the book at chasingyourlife.net. It’s chasing your life dot net and they can find me at joenunz J-O-E-N-U-N-Z.com. All my information is there, the book and events and so forth. Coaching and all that information. So that’s a great place for everybody to find me and love to keeps pumping out that good vibes out there.

NL: Awesome. Well thank you for joining me today Joe. It has been a pleasure chatting to you.

JN: Thank you much for having me.

NL: Awesome. Now guys I encourage you to share this video. You can do that by clicking the Facebook and the Twitter share buttons on this page. And if you click the banner to the side or there should be a link underneath the video here if you’re watching this on Facebook you can go through to Joe’s website from there. And don’t forget to take our 30-second quiz to figure out what’s holding you back from success. So until next time. Remember to live large, choose courageously and love without limits. We’ll see you soon.

 

How to Stop Chasing and Start Living

 


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